How does it actually feel, to snap out of a dream, not the silent, kind, whispering wake-up, but as though you were tied to a dream by a silk thread and it just snaps, without pain, without stretch, just like that. It is not the slow, don't-hurt-me feeling, or that throbbing, itching pain in some part of your unconscious mind, it is just like another step, as though you just walk out of the door, but the thought you had in mind still lingers there, like a wisdom. It feels like you still have that left shoe in your hand, and the right shoe laces are all over the floor, you need to tie them, but then you realize that you don't have to tie them because you are in a different place now, where shoes don't exist, they have no meanings, the laces are still untied and all-over-the-place, but you don't trip on them because that just does not happen anymore, no one trips, the idea-of-tripping over your own laces doesn't exist, tripping doesn't exist!
This morning i woke up, no, i snapped out of my dream, and i was still holding the pen that i was holding in my dream, just that i couldn't see it anymore, but it still lingered, around me, like some kind of smell. I wonder how difficult it is to ignore sometime, and if you are really doing it, it would be the biggest gesture of recognition that you can shower upon anyone. If you feel that you should ignore someone, you are acknowledging the fact that the person exists so intense and strong that you HAVE to ignore. But the point is, how intense is it? How intense is anything in life, or is there? How do we measure the intensity, by the pain it creates at a certain moment, by the scar it leaves behind, or by the time that it lingers? Are all these measurements connected or do they exist within each other?
Well, the thoughts stay here, by my bed, till i wake up tomorrow and nurse them again...
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